Andre Li

Our first date was
one month later, long
after we had met and
since then I had
journeyed into depths and
I didn’t know for sure,
that I would even
recognize you. But

Then you appeared and
I knew you instantly –
You were the handsome man
Glowing and bright
crossing my favorite street.
And I stepped close and
hugged you, unafraid. We
walked together

Across the threshold of
my favorite Japanese place and
sat, not across but side-by-side
and shared our food, me
venturing beyond my comfort zone
emboldened now, with you beside me,
laughing at your tales
of campaigns long fought and won

And I didn’t want it
to end, that night. I
loved taking your arm and
talking so easily for hours and
your gentle kiss good night
without any pressure just
kindness and joy and ease.
And I thought, if he respects me,

If he gives me space but
still comes back to me, weeks
hence, then, maybe. Maybe.
And when you did, when
you loved my home and
you loved my children and
you loved me, then I knew
that you were mine.

My beshert had finally found me.
My Andre, Andre Leigh.

One Day

You’re perfect,
because of this one day.
Because you can rise
and live with us
and love with us
and bring more joy
to our lives and our home
and be our chaperone
when we need one
and step aside
when we need to lead
and keep your own life
even while sharing ours.
It’s not just the one day
coming soon, next year,
when we’ll join our lives
with legal vows.
It’s every day until then,
and every day after,
each one, one day.

Sweet Heart

It’s the sweet heart

the gooey center of you

that we all miss so much.

It’s how you turn our pain

into soft cotton candy, pink

and insubstantial, with just

a laugh, that glorious laugh,

with your kind smile

and generous hug.

We all miss you, our dear,

because there is no one

who brings us all such joy

like you, being you.

 

Faith

I have faith in your love. You will always love me.
I have faith in your strength to withstand what may come.
I have faith in the joy that we bring, blessed be.
I have faith in your laughter, so full and wholesome.

I have faith that the demons will cower in fear
When seeing the brightness our true love creates.
I have faith that those who would throw their spears
Will find that our love is too pure to abate.

I have faith we will face every challenge life brings
Both evil and good, as lovers, as friends.
I have faith that we will grow together, find wings
To lift up our spirits, to soar without end.

I have faith that our faith will just grow over time.
I will always be yours, and my knight will be mine.

Fear (Reprise)

Why is it so scary
for me to care?
To know
that what another person does
or says or feels
can wash through me
and crash cresting
waves of pain or joy?
Fear paralyzes, freezes time
in the most painful moment,
trapped stuck in cloudy
luminescent moonstone.
I have to
choose not
to fear him.
Or I will be stuck
frozen, now –
I have to change
and move forward.
Why not
today?

Shell

Her words, in books,
speak to me of eternal truths
ring clear and vibrant
alighting my soul, and
seeing her speak
should be miraculous
yet instead is sorrowful.
She is, was, gone now, but
then, was a shell of a woman
an emptiness with a voice
a resonance disconnected from joy
yet speaking as if
she knew what it was to love
never living her own words.
I send my light to you
the violet fires you helped ignite
and hope that when
you’re here again, you
learn this time
how to trust in your own joy
and live fully in love.

Trust

“Random post” reblog – and I just love that it’s perfect for me today. Of course.

Cytherean Dreams

I see
the rain, the storm
coming down
changing and cleansing
the world around me
creating happy trees
that vibrate
with joy.
They’re getting
what they need
and I have
to trust
that so will I.

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