Chakra energy, Courage, Healing, Journeys, New Paths, Pain, Truth

Before You

I was triumphant then, flying

carried aloft newfound freedom.

I was abundant then, flowing

ripeness gushing open heart.

I was fearless then, unknowing

ignorant of pain, doubt.

I was bold and brash then, leaping

into brave new opportunities.

I am old and hurting now, limping

pains shooting in aching joints.

I am morose and moody now, knowing

you didn’t want me, not even at my peak.

I am fierce and fed up now, unwilling

to forget or stay silent or shrink.

And I will be me again, returning

to what was me before finding you.

A phoenix reborn.

A goddess healed.

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Chakra energy, Childhood, Family, Friends, Gratitude, Healing, Home, Journeys, Love, Marriage, Miracles, People, Questions, Truth

Found

Found family

Found homes, found loves, found past lives

Isn’t that the point?

Chakra energy, Childhood, Empathy, Family, Fun, Gratitude, Healing, Judaism, Love, Truth

Shana, No Y

When I feel lost, spiraling down
spinning madly like a camera
dropped from a 10,000 foot precipice
I can hold on to this –

I am Shana, no Y.

Know why? It’s the name
my mother whispered in my ear
a cooing sound to tell me
I’m more beautiful to her
than the starlight streaming
into our beds, that first night
of life, in her arms.

I am Shana, no Y.

Shana, or Sarai, or Sarah, after
the first mother of the Jewish people.
I am a mother, first, even if
later than most. Protecting
my young, my people,
matriarch of my world.

I am Shana, no Y.

I am what I am,
In God’s image, female spirit
embodied in the most female of forms
exaggerated breasts and hips and
round backside arching, aching
you embrace me because you, male,
can’t resist melding into me.

I am Shana, no Y.

And still evolving, perfect in
every misshapen moment
every seeming stumble
every award and ascent.
Who am I? No other answer
but this –

I am Shana, no Y.

Chakra energy, Courage, Death, Empathy, Healing, Heartbreak, Hope, Journeys, New Paths, Pain, Questions

Broken

Cytherean Dreams

Do you feel broken?
Are you lying somewhere
empty, drained out
of hope and love
worried for your future
and thinking, as
your heart sinks
that you’ll never see
your dreams
in front of you
never know
the sweetness
of living a pure
and profound life?
Are you broken, beloved?
Can you find
the peace within yourself
be calm and listen
and put yourself together
again?

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Chakra energy, Courage, Empathy, Healing, Heartbreak, Home, Journeys, Love, New Paths, Pain

Let Me Go

I know. You thought
I’d stay here forever
pining and patiently
waiting for when
you decided
wild oats sown
you’d come here
again
and this time
have the courage
to ring the doorbell
call out, I
am here for you
at last! But
I have to leave
I’ve moved on
still connected but
I can’t waste
my life
my time
my energies
when my work
the reason for
the signs and portents
is over, complete.
Time for me
to have a new story
a new reason
and I know you
love me. Real love
means
letting me go.